The Least Perceptive Literary CriticThe most important critic in our field of study is Lord Halifax. Amost individual judge of poetry, he once invited Alexander Pope round togive a public reading of his latest poem.Pope, the leading poet of his day, was greatly surprised when LordHalifax stopped him four or five times and said, "I beg your pardon, Mr.Pope, but there is something in that passage that does not quite please me."Pope was rendered speechless, as this fine critic suggested sizeableand unwise emendations to his latest masterpiece. "Be so good as to markthe place and consider at your leisure. I'm sure you can give it a betterturn."After the reading, a good friend of Lord Halifax, a certain Dr.Garth, took the stunned Pope to one side. "There is no need to touch thelines," he said. "All you need do is leave them just as they are, call onLord Halifax two or three months hence, thank him for his kind observationon those passages, and then read them to him as altered. I have known himmuch longer than you have, and will be answerable for the event."Pope took his advice, called on Lord Halifax and read the poemexactly as it was before. His unique critical faculties had lost none oftheir edge. "Ay", he commented, "now they are perfectly right. Nothing canbe better."-- Stephen Pile, "The Book of Heroic Failures"